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Mauritius Mauritius Hash Trash 536

01-02-2009 Midlands, Chasse Alistair Juliette #536

Sliding onto your screen
In my trash submarine.

Excuse me…
While I squeeze out my drenched pencil and try to figure out what I scribbled on this very muddy page…

Run 536 ~ the pre-cyclonic run …
Hee hee hoo hoo haa haa – just pulling your legs!

Not again!!!
It all started out as a beautiful blue-skied sunny bright morning…when suddenly the rain faeries decided it was time to come out and play – and those heavenly showers opened up with a vengeance like never before…nevertheless…it was an unforgettable trail with ups and downs, astounding scenery, mystical meanderings through the woods and over green luscious fields – another muddy, skiddy and slidy escapade – just what the hash doctor ordered.


Our RA for a RAINY DAY – John the Stallion – helped the GM to scream silence into a very cacophonous circle – WOW – what a noisy bunch of voices under a wet tin roof – brilliant acoustics Gilbert!!



GMAlan called in Mark form the UK who very meekly and sweetly wanted to show his appreciation for this unique experience and thanked everybody for their efforts in making every hash a roaring success.

Wooooo Hooooo – big applause for the HARES!
Alistair, Gilbert, Etienne & Mireille, all partners in today’s MUD CRIME.
Jacqueline was also called in for her contribution tying those Silver and Gold ribbons so artistically everywhere and making sure no-one got lost along the way.

All the hares got a special down-down for these obvious aux contraire reasons, please tick off any of the following to which you do not agree:

Did I mention we also had a beer stop?
Oh yes, drinking beer under the pouring rain gives “getting SLOSHED” a whole new meaning.

1 timer
Nicole & Gaetan (Mauritius)
Nadia (Mauritius)
Eric (Switzerland)
Mark (Wales)
Gilles & family (Mayotte, France)
Annabelle (Mauritius)
Tony (Mauritius)
Alan & Gladys (Mauritius)

We had a HASH BLAST blown over all the way from SURREY – SORRY about that!
We had the honour to welcome in our humble midst some very hard core hashers.
We’re not worthy – we’re not worthy!

Uncle Jerry – who started hashing in Singapore in 1971 – he thought today’s hash was far too short and didn’t have enough mosquitoes!
Mrs. G – she started the Ladies HHH (Harriettes) 36 years ago in Singapore.
Cherry “Green Peace” – because she always wants to save the great white whales.
Graham “ABBA>” – A to B and Back Again.
Big hand for our hash Buddies

2 timer
Tamoko (Japan)

My notebook has suddenly become very muddy and oh so fuzzy and I take no responsibility for the LOGIC in the following down-down notes!

RA John the Sovereign Stallion was up to his old tricks – here goes!

1 ~ MARK was called in for a very simple issue! It is a SIN to wear NEW SHOES. But poor HENRIETTE had to take the down-down because she lured him into it and John growled some indecipherable gobbly gook which I rather not translate right now.

2 ~JEAN … …2 weeks ago John gave the Smelly Blue to Jean who became very angry and wanted John expelled from the Hash. Unfortunately, the Stallion was PROMOTED and not expelled, and came back with revenge written all over him while he ordered Jean to take his punishment like a woman – and the real reason for all this hoo haa? Jean’s new fashionable Smelly in Baby Blue Hue was decorated with non-waterproof paint, proving to be a huge mistake in these cyclonic times!

Here’s to Mr. ANGRY- he’s so blue!
The Stallion sure-footedly escaped the inevitable beer shower trajectory from Jean’s d-d mug.
Maybe we should name the next Cyclone after him?

Someone shouted BEER ABUSE!
I recommend we open a home for abused beers and call it the HASH PUB.

John the RA, the R standing for RELIGIOUS…quoted a verse from Isaiah chapter 32…where God is the Father of all people, the Doctor of all Doctors, the Civil Engineer of all Civil Engineers, the Dholl Purri Seller of all Dholl Purri Sellers…and the GM of all GM‘s.
Oh shoot I think I lost track of this Bible verse?
I fear I also lost track of John’s twisted brain wave ooooooops – mooooooooving on. I think he meant that GOD is a MULTITASKER
Loads of mud on this page!

3 ~ ALISTAIR was called in for asking John to be RA because of other PRESSING ENGAGEMENTS…(now maybe if it was a meeting with Barack Obama or a romantic lunch with Jacqueline…the RA could have overlooked it BUT it was the unacceptable, unforgivable, decidedly unrighteous sin of BEING A HARE and not being able to juggle too many balls at once that earned our dear ALI his kneel-down-down not for MULTITASKING but for MONOTASKING!)
Plus he said Obama cancelled at the last minute … ooh la la, we are in the shadow of greatness!

Who’s who…
In the hash zoo?
Make way
For the animal

JEAN was sporting a brand new Smelly adorned with cheap paint and holding up the previous Smelly Blue like a trophy…wondering who to bequeath it to this time…?
He wanted to give it to a lad who was very devoted to the Hash but who was absent today…and then he thought of giving it to a lady who was also absent today…so to make a long smelly story short and perfumed…he decided to donate it to MARIE FRANCE who was the reason for the other chosen lady not to be at the hash (whatever that means! ~)
NO SPRAYING! (We were short of beers!)
Whoa! It’s a full time job trying to shush these hashers!
Our next run is the VALENTINE RUN – and everyone attending should have a HEART.

It will be a very special run with raffle prizes and a treasure hunt – so…have a heart and join the fun!


GM Alan called a minute of silence for our dear friend and fellow hasher –
BBQ Bearer David Colbert. David’s wife Juliette offered the BBQ food
today and we bowed our heads in silence for David whom we miss very much – all
those that knew him – he was the best!
Our loved ones stay alive forever in our hearts through our fond memories of them.
Thanks to all the ladies who always chirp in to help serve the food, and thanks to Henriette who treated us to her famous delicious home-made coconut cookies.

Hold on tight!
It’s a bumpy ride…
Down the slopes
On my muddy behind!

My t-shirt got torn
On a deer horn
Oh squishy shoe…
What on earth did I step into??

I will be over the moon
To see you all very soon

Come back…
If you dare Zan – Your Edit Hare

The Hash Mish-Management Team
Supreme Being:Alan “Strong On”
Hare Line + Trailmasters:Gilbert “Dodocop”; Tel: (M)910 4062
Deputy: Alan “Strong on”; Tel: (H)675 0365, (M)790 9782
Cellarmaster:Chris & Tess (beer-a-dor/labrador) & Deputy Bob
Hash Horn:Blob “Supremous Blobus”
Religious and Sex Advisor:Alistair
Ice Man:Dave H.
Ha$h Ca$h:Henriette
Drinks for Wimps ‘n Kids:Harold
Hash Market:Marie-Claude
Edit Hare:Zandré,
Stand-in: Adrienne (or anyone who can write)
Kitchen Mistress:Marie Jo (Tel. 453 9675) & Sarah as gourmet deputy

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