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Mauritius Hash Trash 524

10-08-2008 Gallea, Nr. Curepipe Tomek and Isobel Zandré #524

Puzzle of the day…
Bob RU gonna be GM today
And make Peter RA?

524 Giggles in a circle
The weather in this neck of the woods turned out to be superbly dry, and we had a great hasher turn-out. The trail was a mixture of sugarcane and rivulets, with stunning mountain views thrown in for extra thrills

Lord Russell did the Grand Mysterious honours today and stood in grandly as GM.

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Judith, Derek & daughters Emily Jane & Charlotte (UK)
Marie Anne (Mauritius)
Lynsey (Scotland)
Ram (Mauritius)
Sylvie (Mauritius)

2 timer

Martin & Julia (Poland)
Joelle (Mauritius)
Primrose (Mauritius)

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Welcoming back old hashers
The Gallaghers!
Liz, Kevin & Luke
Visiting from Ghana

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GM’s hit list

GM Bob called in the Hares…
Isabelle & Tomek…
They got a celebratory down-down for a downright dazzling hash.

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Next in line…
Big thanks to Zan for today’s food…

Announcement Yoo Hoo!!!
At the Next Hash there will be elections!
AKA re-elections of the Hash Mishmanagement…
(If anyone wishes to volunteer please think about putting your names on the list of the biggest mismanaged team on the island)

On to more (or less) serious matters!

The important question on the RA’s mind was if we had to take little blue pills (hash-Agra) at the next hash for the once-a-year erection?

Methinks that he definitely has his l’s and r’s crossed…RA Peter jumped out of his closet with no less than 2 poems…and after a slight wobble getting his lines crossed…he finally came out with the following lavatorial rhyme…

The Warthog – Part XXIII

On Going Camp & Fouquereaux

For all the allure,
Of Camp Fouquereaux.
The question is sure to be asked,

If a hasher were to drink,
Ten gallons of beer.

Would he pee all over his Pee’ ers?

Some more urinary prose from the pen of the famous Welsh public toilet attendant and hasher – Sir Hugh Rainal.

A beer swilling hasher,
Is as happy as can be.
Except to stop drinking,
When he has to pee.

Not only did he pull out these phrases from his Poetic Gems Travelling Suitcase…
RA Peter had something else up his sleeve …
A holy joke from Claude’s suitcase.

A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem.
While they were there, the wife passed away.
The undertaker told the husband: “you can have her shipped home for $5000 or you can bury her here in the Holy Land for only $150”.
The man thought about it and told the undertaker he would rather have her shipped home.
The undertaker asked: “Why would you spend $5000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful and much cheaper for you to bury her here?”
The man replied:

“Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead. I just can’t take that chance!”

I guess this places Claude in a rather precarious position of Marriage Counsellor to the Hash, for appointments please apply in triplicate at the Trash Desk.

Now finally, let’s see who ended up on the RA LIST.

1 ~Tusia ~! …Fornication on the Hash, a very serious crime ….she was caught with her hands down Perry’s trousers oooooh la la

2 ~ Luke…a complaint reached the RA’s ears about little Luke wearing a Chelsea T-shirt…and called him into the circle. His dad Kevin had to join him for a double D for not controlling his kid (although daddy doesn’t support Chelsea…and was accused by Luke of supporting the RUBBISH Team AKA Man U…oooops we have a dad & son dispute!!!) So Kevin downed it for being a surrogate Chelsea supporter and Luke took his coca cola double d like a true hasher…well done Luke, that’s the spirit!

3 ~ Franchette…she was spotted wearing her Tour de France cap as she was flaunting having been there in person and accused by the RA of Antisocial Cyclical Syndrome…and he almost got a beer shower for his frivolity!

4 ~ MARTIN ~for abandoning the tropical hash for greener pastures in Kiwi land, and going to visit the wonderful Kiwi Hash ~ so the RA reminded him that we also have sheep & goats in Mauritius and he didn’t have to go all the way to New Zealand for hmmmmm…’s to the sheep-sh*gger, he’s so blue…

And finally…

5 ~ Isabelle & Tomek ~for being goody goodies and guilty of blatant sycophantism on this hash!!!

Last but never least… we called upon GM Bob’s tender Mercy for one final very important issue…..

smelly blue!!!

Claude found himself smack in the middle of a very difficult situation…
He was given a 3 second countdown to make up his mind about who to choose for the Smelly Blue…
The reason was simple…
Smelly Blue
Was awarded to Olivier
For his Tattoo!

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(At this point…GIRLS…ooh ooh…my camera froze, if you want to see this famous Tattoo you have to apply within a fortnight at the Trash Desk and we will try our best to give you a viewing appointment of Olivier’s torso Tattoo)
And for this, he had to get DOWN ON HIS KNEES and beg for mercy!

I see…
We have one last junior Hasher left
Jan volunteered to down a sprite for being last… much to mom Lisette’s disbelief!
Ho hum, chums…
Looks like this down-down stuff is rubbing off on the next generation of true blue hashers!
Well done Jan, you are a star.

After all these delicious discussions the crowd had a chance to taste my very own Special Recipe Pasta Hasta la Vista …

Thanks to all the ladies who helped out with the serving and thanks to Jennifer for her priceless tips and to Philida for her pots!

Tips & Pots…
Bubbles and blisters
Giggles and fun
Can’t wait to see you all
On our next run!

Until then
To always
Wear your BEST SMILE!

See you in a short while!

Zan ~ Your Edit Hare

The Hash Mish-Management Team
Supreme Being:BLOB who is a multitasker and still blowing his HORN
Hare Line + Trailmasters:Alan “Strong on”; Tel: (H)675 0365, (M)790 9782
Deputy: Gilbert “Dodocop”; Tel: (M)910 4062
Cellarmaster:Jackie and Bob (J&B)
Hash Horn:Robert “Blob”
Religious and Sex Advisor:Peter “Malignant Growth” and we are still looking for another volunteer for the times when Peter is somewhere else on the planet downing someone else’s beers!
Ice Man:Dave H.
Ha$h Ca$h:Henriette
Drinks for Wimps ‘n Kids:Jean and Philidia
Hash Market:Marie-Claude”
Edit Hare:Zandré,
Stand-in: Adrienne (or anyone who can write)
Kitchen Mistress:Marie Jo (Tel. 453 9675)

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