Mauritius Hash Trash 509
13-01-2008 Northfields Martin Philida And Jean #509
What a HOT HASH!
Read on & you will find how things heated up even more
during the gathering of the infamous ROUND CIRCLE.
First Timers / Hash Virgins Patrick (Mauritius)
Maryke (South Africa)
Alexandra & Annabelle (Reunion)
Second Timers / Two Timers
Nod (South Africa)
Needless to say, the GM had to call for order quite a few times during the circular gathering today, everybody was so excited, especially Alan, who was a right REBEL, could all this mutiny have anything to do with revolutionary hormones raging when on school grounds…I wonder hmmmmm. Schools have strange effects on people, even hardcore hashers.
Thanks to Martin our Hare, your run scored 7 on the Rosemarie Scale and managed to create a whole load of controversy which off course is so unusual for a hash that the GM called for a special introductory double down down… and if I get this wrong which I probably most certainly will, we can blame it all on Alan.
Let me try to explain the inexplicable, let me try to walk you back and make you see the invisible trail of confusion that leads to the following conclusions ~ Jacques was the first to arrive of the front-runners ( ?) and found that some shortcutting hashers had already started drinking, this SIN is punishable by LAW and I must stress the RULE that no-one is allowed to drink before the first runners arrive!
Jacques was also unhappy about the first box, the false trail, the short cutters, everybody that went on the wrong trail except the first ten front runners…Alan thought Jacques was grumbling a bit too much so the GM thought it was a jolly good idea to give them both a down down – Jacques as the front walker and Alan as the front runner, and we all thought the same so here’s to them, they are blue, they are hashers through and through…
Yoopy doopy doo – let’s continue.
Our RA was back with his POETIC GEMS TRAVELLING SUITCASE.
His hormones were also inspired by the school so he recited the following poem ~
The Warthog – Part XXI
Oh bastion of learning.
Of knowledge and of Light.
A fount of learning,
In your own right.
Home to Scholars,
Some by day and by night.
A vestibule of wisdom,
And deep insight.
But blown up would you be quite,
For which we are contrite,
By a tiny stick,
Yep, folks, as you can see the RA is definitely back with a BANG, and very eager to punish all the sinners on his list.
1 ~ Martin was accused of … wait for it … antitatterdemalianism. This has nothing to do with his hare skills of the day, but with some school-photographs of him, spotted by the RA, in which he wore no tie in the photo 2005/2006, but wore a tie in the photo 2006/2007 and therefore becoming an antitatterdemalian and dressing smarter than he did before – so, to tie or not to tie, that is the tongue tied question.
2 ~ One of the RA’s favourite subjects is SEX ON THE HASH. So when Stacey whispered into his ear that Claude, Jean & Marie Claire were up to no good, he gave them the double d for being sexual deviants and made us all wonder what they had been up to???
3 ~ Rosemarie received a perfect down down for being the Goody Goody Mrs. Perfect and the RA just looooooves
to punish goody-two-shoes reprobates.
4 ~ The 10 front runners caught the RA’s attention because of going up the hill and coming down again, so he made them stand inside the circle and sing his version of the
GRAND OLD DUKE OF YORK
HE HAD TEN THOUSAND MEN
AND IF HE HAD THE ENERGY
HE’D HAVE HAD THEM ALL AGAIN
So with all these ups and downs the RA decided to bid the circle adieu…
And now… .
It is time for the Big Blue Smelly Moment, the appearance of our well missed and well sniffed SMELLY BLUE, worn with pride by our very own bar lady, Stacey.
We all wondered who would be the (un)lucky recipient of this prestigious award, by glory or by disrepute?
Stacey, to everybody’s gleaming delight, decided to donate the Smelly to the MEANEST HASHER… none other than our RA himself, PETER.
Peter’s Smelly shower was well deserved, well done, well drenched and well taken.
Attention all hashers, we wish to make a special announcement –
Alan is out HARE-HUNTING.
Setting a hash is an ART, it’s fun and it’s way out, why not give it a try? Alan is short of hares…and was reminded by the RA that he could go and grow some Hairs at the Clinic Greffe de Chevaux, but we really need some HARES without the “I”, so
Don’t think twice
It’s great fun
You could even be
DARE TO BE A HARE
It’s better than
A couch potato…
It’s also good
For your heart rate… oh?
You get to find new places
You get to see new faces
Don’t be scared!
Dare to be a hare!
And on this note I am leaving the boat.
Next hash will be in Britannia and will be set by Alan & David ~ sorry that did not rhyme?
Thank you Philida for today’s food, we had an ever-so-posh-hash with proper tables and chairs and even umbrellas and proper toilets courtesy of Martin’s School – all in the shade and good fun all around.
Just let me try to rhyme
One more time
I am no poet,
I know you know it.
But I just wanted to say
Happy New Year
To all you hashers far and near
May 2008 be
Signing off without my pen…
See you all very soon
Careful of strange wolves
During the full moon.
Zan Your Edit Hare
|The Hash Mish-Management Team|
|Supreme Being:||BLOB who is a multitasker and still blowing his HORN|
|Hare Line + Trailmasters:||Alan “Strong on”; Tel: (H)675 0365, (M)790 9782|
Deputy: Gilbert “Dodocop”; Tel: (M)910 4062
|Cellarmaster:||Jackie and Bob (J&B)|
|Hash Horn:||Robert “Blob”|
|Religious and Sex Advisor:||Peter “Malignant Growth” and we are still looking for another volunteer for the times when Peter is somewhere else on the planet downing someone else’s beers!|
|Ice Man:||Dave H.|
|Drinks for Wimps ‘n Kids:||Jean and Philidia|
|Hash Market:||Marie-André “Madame Papaye”|
Stand-in: Adrienne (or anyone who can write)
|Kitchen Mistress:||Marie Jo (Tel. 453 9675)|