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Mauritius Hash Trash 505

04-11-2007 Anse Jonchée Bertrand + Gilbert Bertrand, At Home #505

Hello there TRASH CROWD!!! What a day! We had double doses of fun & giggles on this EXTREMELY LOOOOOOOOOPY RUN ~ ooh la la hash-a-licious.

Today’s HASH was extreme in all senses, starting off with ups and downs and eye-catching views, crossing over streamlets and sliding down slopes on our HASH BOTTOMS, not to mention getting SOAKED halfway by a proper tropical cloudburst, just in case anyone had forgotten to have a shower prior to coming.

On Rosemarie’s Scale shall we say it scored 9 for DIFFICULTY and 12 for BEAUTY ~ so much so that our one & only DODOCOP even wrote a POEM about it:

Boxes, checks, falsies and the like
Markings as usual
It’s an up and down hike
Everything but casual.

Not much shade
You’ll maybe have to wade
But finally get paid
If not laid.

Wimps, go by the W’s
You may not cross the ford
Come back on your own accord
But please, do not miss the views

Wait for every soul at the hash halt
Moving before, Alan … is a fault.
You see my dear FRB’s
It’s not about birds & bees

Near the top
The beer stop
On the road to home keep on
There’ll be more to come,
ON ON ! ! !


WOW – not too shabby, we might have to give him a second Hash-name! Any suggestions?

Our GM and Supremous Blobus could not attend today’s proceedings because he was being “debachelorised” nudge nudge wink wink say no more!!!

Our tip-top Trailmaster Alan was as usual brilliant at Grand Mastering and he was just too thrilled that Peter would save the day as RA, thus sparing him the multitasking bit.

So … without further ado, let’s roll.

1 timer

Mary & Rosario (Italy)
Simon (UK) also known as “Maestro”
Willy & Anne (Belgium)

2 timer

Phew! The GM had a panic there for a second or two … he almost had to down a beer!

It has been decided to bring on the Smelly Blue immediately, as it was back by popular demand worn by none other than our beautiful Miss Mauritius, Olivia.
Unfortunately for Philida … she was chosen as the next proud owner of this relic hash souvenir for always being nice to everyone and even though the reason was honourable … the Smelly Shower was NOT – smelly, sticky, wishy washy squishy squashy oooooooooh …

Oh sorry, just a quickie loony look at Alan’s Sketch of the day …

In celebration of the festival of the Arrival of the Indentured Labourers in Mauritius … Alan decided to demonstrate by posing Dodocop as the SLAVE and Simon as the BRITISH who abolished slavery … so we all had to give 3 cheers for the arrival of the Indentured Labourers and the crowd whipped into a frenzy …

So our RA saw Alan & Simon discussing this issue and could not help but comment.
When the British took over the island they would have brought with them that wonderful institution called the National Health Service.
This would explain why so many labourers came … it was to receive FALSE TEETH on the NHS, hence they are known as the In – dentured – Labourers! Ha!

And we all know when it would be a good time to see the dentist …?
2h30 OR two thirty OR tooth hurty!!!!!!!!!

We also know that the RA is infamous for talking a load of nonsense so let’s move on!!!

1 ~ Harold came down the mountain and got his trousers torn by a piece of burnt sugarcane … as he was descending he was spotted by the Police who wanted to arrest him for … wait for it … IN DESCENT EXPOSURE or as it is also known – indecent exposure. So our HARRY had to down it for being such an exhibitionist and everybody wondered how this was possible as his trousers looked pretty intact and it might have been that the RA had a crack in his glasses.

2 ~ THE HARES … they got their d-d for accusing the front runners of shortcutting but did not realise that the RA was one of them and it is NOT ON to accuse the RA and his friends so this proves that yet again it is not WHAT you know but WHO you know, even on the HASH … so the moral of this down-down is to stick with the RA and you will be safe … or not … from downing a beer.

3 ~ Alan interrupted the flow and announced a very special Hash-guest today, Leslie’s mom Ella who is 90 years old and graced us with her lovely & joyful presence … we almost gave her a beer to down as well !!!

4 ~ Last but not least this down-down goes to … MARIE-CLAUDE for frivolously shouting ON ON for no apparent reason … this is an RA SPECIAL Double Disaster because I am not even sure that Marie-Claude came on the trail today? As usual methinks the RA is hallucinating, that might be why she caught him off guard and poured half the beer on him!!!

Hmmmmm … We still need volunteer HARES for upcoming HASHES, if you want to have a zealous zesty adventure why not try your hand at this … surely it will be GREAT FUN.

Today’s lunch bites were YUM YUM YUM, Bertrand organised Farata and everyone had more than enough, & thanks to Henriette we even had sweets so as usual FOOD was FAB.
Thanks – you guys are the BEST!

Hash 506, ooh where … what … who … and how – pop in and we will have the info soon enough, so … contain your excitement and start jumping up & down … all together now!!!

So while you wait … take the world in a love embrace & live large!

Lights out.

Zan – your zany edit hare.  

The Hash Mish-Management Team
Supreme Being:BLOB who is a multitasker and will still be blowing the HASH HORN
Hare Line + Trailmasters:Alan “Strong on” Grihault; Tel: (H)675 0365, (M)790 9782
Deputy: Gilbert “Dodocop” Leste; Tel: (M)910 4062
Cellarmaster:Jackie and Bob (J&B)
Hash Horn:Robert “Blob” Latimer
Religious and Sex Advisor:Peter “Malignant Growth” and we are still looking for another volunteer for the times when Peter is somewhere else on the planet downing someone else’s beers!
Ice Man:Dave Hughes
Ha$h Ca$h:Henriette Decotter
Drinks for Wimps ‘n Kids:Jean and Philidia Ramiah
Hash Market:Marie-André Boullé
Edit Hare:Zandré Wallwin,
Stand-in: Adrienne (or anyone who can write)
Webmasters:Rey “Hot Pants” and / or
Bob “Lord Russell” (
Kitchen Mistress:Marie Jo Constantin (Tel. 453 9675)

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