Mauritius Hash Trash 409

07-03-2004 Benares Jean (assisted By Allan & Sarah) #409

The Hash that Jean set.


Jean, (assisted by Allan & Sarah)

First Timers
Robert, Dodocop’s brother. Dodocop, being the helpful friendly brotherly policeman that he is, advised his brother that he should come to the hash wearing his lovely bright white new shoes… ‘ello, ‘ello, ‘ello – what have we here then!
Twiggy – ok so she was cute and everything, but let’s be honest, she did look like a dog.

Second Timers
Last time Hans came and we gave him extra beer. This time Hans came back and we gave him extra beer. There’s a connection here somewhere, if I could just see it.

On On.

The trail led us rapidly down to the coastal path. It was mercilessly hot running, forcing all but the fittest to ease off and walk, which was a good thing as it allowed us to take in the glorious views.
Sometimes on the so-called “English Riviera” in Cornwall it stops raining, the sun shines, and the wind is light. To walk along the Cornish coast on such days can be quite breath-taking: the combination of warmth, natural rugged scenery, the rhythm of the waves upon the rocks, the slight salt taste in the air and the unexpectedness of it – that this is something wonderful in dull, rainy Britain! It was the same in Benares. We’ve been having atrocious weather caused by cyclone Gafilo, rainy and miserable, and yet here was this fabulous day, glorious sun, majestic views all seemingly laid on for us to marvel at. Pity the “stay-at-homes” and “lie a-beds” who missed out on seeing Mauritius showing off its finest.

It didn’t stop there. The hash-circle was excellent – what could be more delightful than Marie-Andre, Henriette and “Barbie Doll” reclining under the branches of a shady spreading ficus? Fazila’s briani was worth the entrance fee alone (please will you show me how to make a proper briani). The beer was well chilled and so were we.

Thank you Jean, and Allan & Sarah and well done for giving us sunshine!

Jimmy’s on holiday…
So we found out about Gime (pronounced ‘jee-may’), a Mauritian of Scottish descent, who went to his doctor’s surgery to have sex. Now that’s what I call Private Health care!

Blob officiated. The RA, Hot Dog, was here, but had lost his voice, so Blob had to plug the gap…Ordinarily having his gap plugged would have made the RA cry out, but, like I say, he’d lost his voice.
Acting RA Blobus had duly noticed that the aforementioned Robert had been proceeding in a somewhat southerly direction attired in shoes, running, 1 pair, condition – new! In time-honoured fashion, he called for the removal of one shoe and, with Robert not quite able to believe this was happening, poured beer in it. But, and here’s the thing, the down-down was intended for Dodocop for having set his brother up in the first place, but finally went to Captain Nimmo who proved the rule that if you keep your gob flapping long enough at the hash someone’s bound eventually to put something in it, and if you’re lucky it’s only a beer.
The hares were given down-downs for making the acting RA get lost (while short-cutting!).

The Smelly Blue.
We were at this venue in April last year (Hash Trash 385). On that occasion Hot Dog was awarded a down-down for, and I quote “..insisting that there are no rules but criticising others for breaking the rules”. And he is STILL flaming well at it. He just hasn’t stopped whingeing and moaning, moaning and whingeing – exactly the same as before except this time not even the laryngitis stopped him!! He gets the smelly blue, so he can at least have something worth complaining about, and if he asks nicely I might let him borrow my wire brush and dettol (Ask him, he’ll explain).
Strong On’s contribution to the Arty Farty Blue was a good-looking ancient animal with a running problem – bit of a coincidence isn’t it?!

Children’s Award
The boy at the back hasn’t come back…and it turned into a ballroom blitz, (again). Please return and give the award to someone else so I can get this song out of my head. (Note to everyone – it’s by a group called “The Sweet”, it’s actually called “The Ballroom Blitz” and it was a hit in the ‘70’s and I’ll sing some of it on the next hash so you all know what I’m talking about.)


Marathon, Man..
Gilbert L. is trying to persuade us to run a marathon. We all instinctively looked to the skies for the flock of pigs flying past. Then he pointed out that you didn’t have to run the whole marathon yourself but could run 5 or 10 kms at a time as a team as part of some Mauritius marathon thingy. This is a proper and so “commercial” event (hence no plug), but that doesn’t mean we couldn’t do something useful for charity as part of it. (Twice? In one year?). We formed a sub-committee to look into it. Yes, that’s right – a sub-committee.

Lights, Curtain, Action…
One of our harriettes is in a play. I won’t say whom – preserves the mystery!! She doesn’t have a large part, but we understand she works at it every night so it’s now very well polished and she’s invited some of us along to see it and maybe give her a clap afterwards. I’ll send round an e-mail if I get the info in time, otherwise she’ll just have to give us a private performance later.

Blob’s camp
It’s this weekend– from this Thursday through to Sunday. There will be a lamb spit on Saturday night at a small expense to cover the cost. There are loads of games to be played. It’s all systems go! As it is National Day on Friday take a Mauritian flag with you to put on your tent.

Next Hash
21 March
Hare Hot –Dog
Venue – to be notified…watch this space.

Next Food:


On on on on on on on on on on on on oooooooon, on on!
On on on on on on on on on on on on oooooooon, on on.
On onon on on, on onon on on, on ononon on on on oooon
on on on on on on on on on on on on oooooooon, ON ON.
(with deepest apologies to Ludvig Van Beethoven)

Alan’s Receeding Hareline:
DateRun No.Hares   –   Area
21st March410Eric – (Run in Eric’s garden ?)
4th April411Jqcques, Rosemary
18th April412Tomek, Tusha
2nd May413Leslie & Annand

1. Would hashers please note that there is a deposit (money) on glass bottles (beer, softies)! Please do not throw them away, leave them on the beach or with the rubbish (or even take them home).
2. Walks take place on most Sundays when there is no Hash. See the “Friendly walks” page for details.

Supreme Being:Leslie Nimmo
Hare Line + Trailmasters:Alan “Strong on” Grihault
Cellarmaster:Andy “The Hustler” Belfitt
Hash Horn:Robert “Blob” Latimer
Religious Adv/Sex Councillor:Patrice Curé
Barbecue Bearer:Dave “Shorty” Colbert
Ice Maiden:Rey Joseph
Ha$h Ca$h:Claudia Carey
Drinks for Wimps ‘n Kids:Jean Ramiah
Hash Market:Juliette “Snow White” & David “Shorty” Colbert
Edit Hare:Tom “Decoy” Williams
Always willing deputy Edit Hare:Sarah “Coffee Mate” Grihault
Webmaster:Bob Russell( )
Website:  OR

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